NBD - Week 5 Review B

Gotta start this one off with a shout-out to Michael Toobin, who hooked me up this weekend with a ride to Screen's wedding, some kind words on the blog, and some sound estate planning advice. I'm going with the revocable living trust! (I want to keep my affairs private and confidential and give myself the opportunity to move to or own property in another state.) Happy 60th, Mr. T! Sorry I have to start off these reviews with...


You Got Got (150) defeats Burke City Giants (77)
The Giants may be the league's paper powerhouse, but You Got Got is the team most capable of putting up a ginormous day, which they did once again in Week 5, topping their previous scoring record by .06 points. Amazingly, this was done despite some weak outings by the traditional YGG workhorses, MJD (6) and Chris Johnson (4). The rest of the team provided an onslaught of awesomeness, however, with You Got Gotters representing four of the top six Week 5 offensive scorers (though amongst those, Hasselbeck was on the bench). Roddy White (33) and Miles Austin (37) were the top two fantasy players this week, which is pretty amazing considering that Colly picked up Austin at two in the morning on Sunday. For a guy whose previous acquisitions had included the instantly injured Laurent Robinson and the utterly useless Kerry Collins, this was a huge home run. I just paid $16 fantasy bucks to get Austin in another league, and I'm sure he'll never even remotely approach this week's total again. Colly's team was also helped along by Matt Ryan (26), who rebounded in a big way from last week (8), and the Minnesota Defense (20, whose Jared Allen has looked like a potential MVP the past two weeks. On the other side of the field, Michael's team was led by the ever-reliable Peyton Manning (23), but other than Wes Welker (13), Peyton got little support in this one. Michael is considering bringing in a consultant to get Randy Moss (4) and Tom Brady back on the same page.

0-4 But Not a Skins Fan (93) defeats Deuceburger (80)
It would have been a huge moral victory for the 'Burger, owned by Skins fan Kevin Manning and featuring both Santana Moss and the Washington Defense, to take this one from the no-longer winless Koehler. But alas, it was not to be, with Santana (4) and the D (8) doing little to help in that miserable loss to the Panthers. Manning has some big guns, but with one of the worst supporting casts in the league, Matt Schaub (22) and Adrian Peterson (20) are often left crying in the wilderness.* Koehler's team is often just as bad and has no superstars, but this week they managed to cobble together a decent total from a number of solid contributions. Clinton Portis (19) led the way, though he ought to be docked 10 fantasy points for that dipshit sideways run in the end zone that got him safetied. Kurt Warner (20) also had his first Kurt Warner-y day of the year, and Dwayne Bowe (13) also met the pre-season expectations of him for the first time. With Tim Hightower and Visanthe Shiancoe (11 each) both stepping up, it was inevitable that our league's cellar-dweller finally got his first victory.

*If you've forgotten/never knew how radical the Congos song "Children Crying" is, now would be a good time to re-explore. "De-yoop, de-yah, de-yoooooooh, de-yoop-yoop-yoop!"