BIFL - Week 3 Review B

Tonight was Greek Night here on Baltic Street. Me and the girls get together, cook a decent meal, drink some wine, and watch our favorite ABC Family program, Greek. I've only lived here for a week, but already we're building traditions. It's nice to build traditions. And no BIFL tradition is stronger than...



Bardois Bourgeoisie (87) defeats Charm City Kung Fu Rodents (83)
For seven straight games now, Bardey has beat Andre. That ties the record for longest streak of dominance over another team, matching Dre's own 7-game run of dominance over Billy. This may have been Andre's best shot at breaking the trend, as he needed only 16 points from Tony Romo on Monday night to pull out a win. Alas, Romo is a shitbag, and was only able to muster up 12 points. Amazingly, his fantasy output in a winning effort was far inferior to his Bourgeoisie counterpart, Jason Campbell. Somehow, Campbell managed to put up 29 points. I watched that game. His performance wasn't worth any fucking 29 points. Santana Moss earned his points; that's it as far as Redskins are concerned. And, amazingly, that's basically what won it for Dois. His next-highest scorers were Kevin Smith (13) and Matt Forte (11). How that adds up to a victory, I'm not sure, but if I were Dre I'd be pointing the finger at Turl Owens (0), who went without a catch for the first time in 185 games. That's much longer than a seven-game losing streak, and it could start a new trend: that of TO riding the fantasy pine.

Merriman's Bitch-Chokers (117) defeat Pet Monkey (91)
This was it: Shawne Merriman's chance to set things right and punish Will for using his name without actually rostering him. And what did he do? Nothing. Literally nothing: 0 points. I should have known that 'roided-up dipshit would let me down. Then again, even the strongest IDP performance in history probably would not have made up the difference in this game, a difference built largely on the shoulders of Peyton Manning (33). That makes Manning the top scorer in fantasy through the first three weeks, a position he enjoyed frequently throughout the mid-aughts. Many of us foresaw a "Fuck You" season from LaDainian Tomlinson, out to prove he wasn't washed up, or from Tom Brady, who needed to show that he could regain his record-setting '07 form. But perhaps it's Peyton who has come to prove that he's far from washed up. After all, he's now without his BFF Marvin Harrison and lost supposed #2 receiver Anthony Gonzalez to injury. Maybe it's Peyton's time to show that he's a badass no matter what he's working with, and no matter that he's getting up a bit in years. Then again, maybe he just had a good week. The Bitch-Chokers also got a big day out of Brent Celek (19), who - along with DeSean Jackson - showed for the second straight week that the Philadelphia passing game goes on without Donovan McNabb. Andy Reid knows what he's doing. Jim Zorn, alas, does not.