NBD - Week 1 Previews and Predictions

Git yaself ready for today with some preview action:

The Death Panel vs. Woody's Warriors
I foresee a good match, with the Saints-Lions game (featuring Sovic's Brees and Woody's Megatron) posed to deliver some big numbers to this one. Considering the relatively anemic performance of Woodrow's Thursday Night crew, though, I feel comfortable picking The Death Panel to win it.

A-Town Starbuckers vs. You Got Got
Presumably, the A-Town Starbuckers will get over how difficult it is to drop Jermichael Finley and pick up a kicker this morning. Even if they don't, though, Santonio Holmes bigtime Week 1 could probably make up for it. YGG's Chris Johnson, on the other hand, needs some back-up. Unfortunately, I don't think he's gonna get it. Advantage: Starbuckers

Kiss the Baby vs. Deuceburger
It's gonna be hard to determine a winner in this one, since both teams wear the same helmet and say the same things. I predict a slow start for both these teams this year, but one team has Adrian Peterson, and the other does not. That tilts it in favor of Deuceburger.

Burke City Giants vs. I'm at the Pizza Hut
Father and son collide in this opening week face-off of the Toobins. The elder Toobin's team is the pre-season juggernaut, making it hard to pick against them. Throw in the fact that Michael's Patriot twins (Moss & Welker) are lining up against the potentially woeful Buffalo Bills, and the choice is clear: Burke City

Bartelby vs. NoFunLeague
Well, NoFunLeague certainly got the better end of Pittsburgh's offense Thursday night, with Papkin's Big Ben and Hines Ward scoring ten times as many points as Ray's Willie Parker. That early advantage might be slightly undone if Anquan Boldin (questionable) doesn't play or is limited, but unless somebody (looking at you, Frank Gore) comes up with something big, I'm giving this one to the No Fun League.

Matt Ryan Loves Dogs vs. Wild Stallions
Steven Jackson and Clinton Portis are two guys who could definitely break down later in the season. But this is Week 1, so they're probably okay for now. Their combined powers, plus the fact that a big Larry Fitz day for DeYoung will be automatically countered by a big Kurt Warner day for Koehler, means the edge in this one goes to Matt Ryan Loves Dogs.

Enjoy the games, and good luck to everyone but Sherwood, who can eat shit, choke on it, die, go to hell, and then spend the rest of eternity eating more shit.