BIFL - Week 8 Review A

OK I've kind of sucked at doing game re-caps this year. Sorry about that. I'll try to make up for it during the remainder of the season. For starters, let's take a look at some of tonight's Menomenas.

Ass-Ramming HotCocks vs. Kurt Beran
This is the beauty of IDPs. Chuck needs 4.5 points out of Mario Williams to tie. Williams' season average is 3.5.

Juse and the Argonauts vs. Vatican Dragons
At the moment, Justin holds an 11-point lead with no one left to play. Dre has Reggie Wayne to go tonight, but if he wants to get real creative he could drop Justin Tuck (his DL on bye) and grab someone playing tonight for insurance. Or maybe he can't do that. I'm not 100% clear on how the waiver wire works anymore.

Iron Chef of Pounding Poon vs. Louwer Loudoun Tribe
This is a bit of a stretch, but it's not out of the realm of possibility for Andre Johnson to go nuts tonight. He'll need to drop at least 25, plus whatever Dwight Freeney manages from Dick's DL spot.

While those match-ups should provide plenty of excitement whilst watching tonight, a few others are already salted away. Enjoy those after the jump:


I'm Fucking In (86+) defeats Pet Monkey (60.5)
By all rights, Spencer should be hooting and hollering at the TV tonight, rooting on his running back duo of Arian Foster, Donald Brown, and IDPer Bernard Pollard. He should be taking joy in every big Foster gain, every Brown screen pass, and every Pollard tackle as he watches his team inch closer to victory. But Billy has cruelly robbed him of that opportunity by absolutely sucking, and in the process sucking any suspense out of this would-be Monday Night Match-Up. For a season and a half now, Aaron Rodgers has been the old reliable horse that Hollywood has strapped his wagon to. But with a few more Sundays like this one (6), the horse will be ready for the glue factory. Most of the other Monkeys followed Rodgers' lead, with a trio of receivers totaling seven points, and kicker Nick Folk (-1) revealing the little-publicized rule that gives our kickers negative points for field goals missed under 40 yards. I'm sure we've all had other kickers penalized thusly before, but we probably didn't notice because, you know, they managed to score at least one other point.
Spence's squad was energized by the return of a full-strengthish Antonio Gates (22), who despite his recent injury woes has only had one week out of double-figures and was right back to dominant form in Week 8. At this point, Gates is not just first among tight ends (by a ways), he's third among all WR/TEs which, if it stands, will probably be the highest a tight end has ever finished in that category. Gates was nearly matched this week by the Tampa Mike Williams (20), who along with his Seattle counterpart is giving the Steve Smiths a run for their money in terms of the best pair of receivers in the league with the same name. While the Smiths can pretty easily be ID'd as 1.0 and 2.0, it's not clear to me who deserves what number amongst the Williamses. Seattle MW had been largely forgotten about or dismissed as a bust coming into this season, whereas Tampa MW was getting some sleeper hype. As such, Tampa MW was on my fantasy radar before Seattle MW, even though Seattle is older. Who is Mike Williams 1.0 and who is Mike Williams 2.0? Perhaps we'll just make it a season-long contest, and whoever comes out on top will gain the 1.0 label for next year.
This re-cap just got totally de-railed. Drew Brees (18), Sebastian Janikowski (16!). Fin.

Your Stepdad (95) defeats Alligator Fuckhouse (66+)
It's that time of the season where the Bye weeks really start to hit heavy, and Souts' roster was decimated by players taking the day off on Sunday, missing Joe Flacco, Ahmad Bradshaw, Peyton Hillis, and Jeremy Maclin. The resulting starting line-up was nothing horrible, but Souts needed some hit-or-miss types to be hits, and they came up misses: Shonn Greene (3), Mike Wallace (4). Most of Dekker's line-up looks equally unspectacular, but a pair of big outings was enough to lead him to victory. Jamaal Charles owners and fantasy football writers like to bitch about him not getting the primary carries, but being the 'back-up' to Thomas Jones seems to be working out just fine for him (25 pts this week), TJ, and the Chiefs. Terrell Owens was also supposed to have second-banana status this season, but he's been way more productive than Chad Ochocinco. Over his past four games, he's scored 87 points, which is more than any of the Fuckhouse receivers have scored all year. So, yeah, fuck Terrell Owens.

I saw this this week and liked it. Maybe not entirely coincidental that I'm posting it immediately after writing about Dekker, Souts, and TO: