BIFL - Some Week 13 Reviews

Most of you passed on your opportunity to write Week 13 game reviews, which I found to be quite lame. But Justin and Dick answered the call. Their re-caps can be found after the jump.


Iron Chef of Pounding Poon (85) defeats Your Stepdad (79)
Just like your stepdad in real life, "Your Stepdad," after showing so much promise in the beginning, just ended up being another dick that fucks the dog.  Take a little time to let that sink in..........In short, Dekkers "Stepdad's" were a total disappointment in week 13.  Losing to the last ranked team in the league and getting knocked out of first place in the last regular season game has gotta sting a bit.  And to add insult to injury, the player that singlehandedly won the game for the Iron Chef's also singlehandedly picked apart and embarrassed the Redskins Defense.  That's right, the old veteran, Brandon Jacobs.  Not only did he exceed his yearly average by about 16 points, he scored more points against the Redskins than he had the previous 4 weeks combined.  Must have been because Haynesworth wasn't playing.  But I digress.  Although it was kind of Dekker to let me win the last game of the regular season after a shitty year, a simple QB substitution would have put me in the losers bracket once again.  But fuck it--I'll take what I can get.  Prediction:  the Iron Chef's are going to win the Losers Bracket and by doing so, become the biggest losers.

Juse and the Argonauts (111) defeat Cow Fister (85)
The Argos win the pennant! The Argos win the pennant! This last weekend, the stars aligned, the clouds  of the perfect storm parted to allow the Argos’ ship to sail through to first place in the league.  I started off the weekend missing the Eagles’ game because I was watching “Must Love Dogs.”  Ironic? Yes, if I was actually watching the movie and not at the f-ing hospital working missing Mr. Vick put up another respectable performance leading the team with (30) points.  True story though, I read something about Percy Harvin needing to go to a specialist for his migraines – he had yet another episode which jeopardized his playing time.  The gears in my head immediately started grinding with me daydreaming of being the migraine specialist neurologist to Mr. Harvin.  Then I made a mental note to wake up early on Sunday to see if he was going to be able to play.  I even dreamed about getting up and checking the ticker on my iPhone.  But alas, being on the West Coast where the morning games start way too early, I woke up and saw that Mr. Harvin was already not playing.  So the Argo’s took a hit with that goose egg.  FML.   My running backs sensed that the Argo’s were showing weakness in the WR corps and SJax and RunDMC put forth great efforts of 19 and 16.5, respectively. Cedric Benson did not want to feel left out scoring 17 from the bench.  Yay, DMC made a tackle, I know that makes Sovic happy, or is it when he sees the kicker make a tackle?  At least Marques Colston and Jason Witten (by the way a great deal at $1 acquisition off the waiver wire) have been producing down the stretch, hopefully they can continue the trends. The Argo Defense put forth a total of 14 point effort which has been a strength of the Argos giving that little extra… spunk.  So Cow Fister lost.  He had players that did not perform as well.  Adrian Peterson is good (32 points on a bum leg)  And here’s the secret behind my man-crush on RunDMC, it’s all based on my guilt from not drafting ADP his first year after leaving OU.  I told myself I was going to draft him, and then I got greedy and thought I could wait one more round and get him for a deal, and I lost him.  So I vowed to never let this college phenom out of my sights.  What’s that sound?  Oh yeah, it was Shoaf getting swept.  I hope he still stands by his words when he said he didn’t feel so bad losing to me.  Kinda like losing to the Bills?