BIFL - Week 4 Preview

With Week 4, bye week season begins, so this'll be the first time (well, other than the random Ravens-Texans week off) that we'll see last-minute pick-ups and fill-ins. Scores should drop a bit, and we might see some truly feeble performances, though it'll be hard to be feebler than Dick's Week 1 or Souts Week 3. Let's see who's really gonna eat it this week:

Egon Spengler (2-1) vs. Juse and the Argonauts (0-3)
I'll admit it: I'm deathly afraid of Brandon Marshall against the Chiefs. My only hope is that the Broncos first three touchdowns will be on pass plays to Eddie Royal or Tony Scheffler or whoever, and then the run game will take over. Otherwise, though, I like the guys I drafted for myself over the guys I drafted for Juse. Either way, I sort of win.
Spengler by 4

Iron Chef of Pounding Poon (1-2) vs. Chip Lohmiller (2-1)
Fear again informs my decision here, but this time it's fear of Lohmiller's Tony Romo and T.O. beating up on the 'Skins as they did last season. If I allow that fear to govern my decisions, though, I'm letting the terrorists win, so I'm going to say the boys in Burgundy and Gold hold strong and lock 'em down a bit. Plus I like a few Iron Chef players this week, as Carson Palmer is due to get back on track against the Browns, LDT should rip apart the Raiders even with questionable health, and Steve Smith should have at least a few big plays against the Texans.
Iron Chef by 5

Pet Monkey (2-1) vs. Sky Vault Centurions (2-1)
You would think that with three players on a bye and three players ruled Out, Dr. Dre would have a hard time putting a starting line-up together this week, but in truth all his starters seem pretty legit. Josh Reed is certainly not a guy I'd want to rely on every week, but when you're playing the Rams, every offensive players is pretty much a good fantasy bet. Billy, on the other hand, is not overly affected by the bye week, but his list of opponents (Tampa Bay, Minnesota, Carolina, Dallas) is like a who's who of fantasy-killers.
Centurions by 7

Manatee Eaters (3-0) vs. Alligator Fuckhouse (2-1)
Both these teams look pretty lame to me this week, despite their winning records. Several of Chuckles' best players are taking the week off, and several of Souts' best players are simply not very good. However, the Fuckhouse has a bunch of guys going in the Cincinnati-Cleveland game, which should be high-scoring, so I'll give it to them in a squeaker.
Fuckhouse by 2

Cholish Chachfaces (2-1) vs. Jeff Stryker is not really gay (0-3)
Has anyone else noticed that all Jeff Stryker's IDPs are Steelers? So far as I know, Will has some Philadelphia ties, but no claim to Steelers fandom, and in fact has been to Pittsburgh only once, when we visited for some kind of Delt meeting(?) in college and stayed with my aunt. Shoaf, what the fuck were we there for? I can't really remember doing anything there. Anyways, Adrian Peterson is Questionable this week (shocker!) and Chalski's team is awesome and finally starting Philip Rivers.
Chachfaces by 14

FUBAR (1-2) vs. Skinny White Guys (1-2)
I really want to take the Gringos Flacos here, as Matt Forte, Ryan Grant, Andre Johnson, and Santonio Holmes are integral parts of other fantasy teams for me. Unfortunately, though, FUBAR's got Drew Brees and Frank Gore playing against each other, and I'm not confident in the Saints stopping the Niners or the Niners stopping the Saints, plus Lee Evans should catch 6-7 deep touchdown passes on the Rams, so I'm afraid it's a bad day for me and Bardey.
FUBAR by 7

Last week: 4-2
Overall: 14-4

Here's a hot chick:



And here's some crazy nature:

Good luck to all in Week 4, even Justin. I'm magnanimous like that, bitches.