NBD - Week 6 Preview

Your Week 6 bye teams are: Buffalo, Kansas City, Tennessee, and Pittsburgh, which means you'll be missing maybe one respectable fantasy quarterback and maybe two quality fantasy receivers. Running backs might be a scramble, however, with Marshawn Lynch, Larry Johnson, Chris Johnson, and LenDale White all sitting. Our games:

Stadler & Waldorf (1-4) vs. Lassard Blows Harris (2-3)
I both look forward to and dread this match-up every year, as nothing would give me more pleasure than to beat Sam. And yet, my team is atrocious, so the odds of it happening are relatively slim. This week, for example, I appear to be starting two Houston Texans receivers. Why? I have no idea. They're playing the Dolphins, who are second-worst in the league at giving up fantasy points to receivers (where does he get these wonderful stats?), so that's a positive, I guess. Still, not a lot of confidence for me playing against the reborn Ronnie Brown, the recovered Justin Fargas, and Donovan McNabb, who'll have nothing to do but pass against the 49ers as Brian Westbrook sits with broken ribs.
LBH by 3

CH Croakies (3-2) vs. Wyld Stallyns (2-3)
The Redskins should beat the living shit out of the Rams this Sunday, but with Jason Campbell on Elliott's team and Santana Moss on DeYoung's, the fantasy results of that may negate each other in this game. Instead, the difference-maker should be E's Adrian Peterson playing a helpless Detroit Lions defense, whereas Jon's Steven Jackson should be relatively bottled up by London Fletcher-Baker et al.
Croakies by 8

Chestpubes & Ballfro (3-2) vs. Hamster Now Guinea Pig (4-1)
Colly's roster has a lot of red on it, with possible sits for Roddy White, Darren McFadden and LaDainian Tomlinson. I'm sure LDT will play against his hated Patriots, but I'm not so sure about the other two, and even in McFadden plays he'll be losing touches to the returning Fargas. Haller, on the other hand, has Cutler-Marshall playing at Mile High against a not-as-stout-as-usual Jax defense and Clinton Portis against the hapless Rams.
Hamster by 9

The Leadfarmers (3-2) vs. Tri Steeg Area (2-3)
I think these guys have some kind of pact to try and piss me off, because as of Saturday afternoon Derek has a starter with a bye week (LenDale White) and Manning has an empty spot in his starting line-up (TE). Educated guessing tells me that Derek will be plugging that whole with the useless Chris Perry, whereas Manning has Owen Daniels and a questionable Kellen Winslow as options at tight end. This game also features the Manning brothers going against each other, and I've heard various football pundits discussing who is the better Manning brother this season. Fantasy-wise, this week, it'll be Eli playing the Browns, not Peyton playing the Ravens. But I still give the edge in this one to the Tri Steeg.
Area by 5

Burke City Giants (4-1) vs. Mephistopheles (2-3)
The second annual DadBowl! I hope these two can get a break from Arts & Crafts time this sunday to head down to the rec room of their nursing home and watch the games. Don't go in there to visit without ear plugs, though. These old deaf fuckers turn the volume up LOUD. What they're likely to see is a pretty ugly game. Michael's RB opponents are all amongst the league's best at shutting down the run game, and Ray's RBs (Warrick Dunn and Cedric Benson) simply have no run game to shut down. If it comes down to WRs, Michael's big boy Reggie Wayne is going up against the solid Ravens' D, whereas Mephisto's Greg Jennings takes on a porous Seahawks secondary.
Luciferians by 7

Matt Ryan Loves Dogs (3-2) vs. Woody's Warriors (1-4)
As I noted in the Week 5 Review, Woody's team gets closer and closer to overtaking mine for worst in the league every week, and with Calvin Johnson now following Brian Westbrook to the trainer's room, this could be the week he completes the takeover. Koehler's team looks better to me at almost every position, and neither MRLD nor the Warriors have any particularly frightening defenses on their opposition list. Should be high-scoring, and a blowout.
SPCA by 12

Last week: 6-0! Thanks to my late switch in support of Chestpubes. Well done, Will Ferrell.
Overall: 20-10

God damn these half-Japanese girls:
And these semi-retarded pigs:

Good luck to all in Week 6, except for Papkin, who I hope gets mauled by said semi-retarded pigs.