Oh also, I'm heading back out to bars to watch today's games, and I'm leaving before noon, so Will: please check and see if Roddy White is gonna play for my Uberleague team today, and if not, check on Anthony Gonzalez's status. If neither is gonna start, please add Antwaan Randle El to my roster and start him. You can drop Laurence Maroney. He's a fucker.
Juse & the Argonauts (1-4) vs. Manatee Eaters (5-0)
At 1-4, Juse's team would seem to be much, much worse than the undefeated Eaters, but looking at the rosters, the difference doesn't seem quite that stark to me. Juse's Willis McGahee is pretty worthless, what with all his injuries and Le'Ron Mc'Cla'in around, but if he's ever gonna have a big week, it'll be this one against the Colts. And Chuck's Peyton Manning is pretty solid, but will probably struggle against the solid D of the Baltimore. Juse still has that nasty wide receiver group, and Chuck is starting Bernard Berrian. You know what? Let's give it to the underdog.
Arghhhonauts by 5
Iron Chef of Pounding Poon (3-2) vs. Sky Vault Centurions (3-2)
Clinton Portis and Brandon Jacobs going against the Rams and Browns, respectively, looks pretty damn unstoppable to me. A probably LDT and a questionable Laveranues Coles seem relatively more stoppable. As far as stopability goes, I have to give the edge to Andre.
Centurions by 8
Egon Spengler (2-3) vs. Chip Lohmiller (2-3)
One of these teams is gonna come out of this contest 2-4, and that doesn't seem right. These are decent teams. Unfortunately I think it's gonna be me. Here's who I'm afraid of this week: Tony Romo against Arizona (6th in points given up to QBs), MJD against Denver (3rd in points given up to RBs), TO against Arizona, and Shaun Suisham against St. Louis (3rd in points given up to kickers). That's right, I'm afraid of a kicker, but that's probably appropriate when you're about to lose to Chip Lohmiller.
Lohmiller by 9
Pet Monkey (3-2) vs. Cholish Chachfaces (3-2)
Billy has four potential starters on Byes this week (Larry Johnson, Ben Roethlisberger, LenDale White, Willie Parker) and as of this posting he's starting a receiver who's definitely out (Reggie Brown) and another who's questionable (Roddy White). I feel like I don't even need to look at Mark's roster to confidently pick him as the winner. So I won't.
Chach by 6
I'm watching SportsCenter right now and Hannah Storm is doing her weekly segment with Emmitt Smith. Emmitt just picked Clinton Portis as his RB-to-watch this week... and then promptly forgot what team he played for. This guy is a fucking moron. How does he still have a job?
FUBAR (3-2) vs. Alligator Fuckhouse (2-3)
Soutendijk's team is awful. And if he goes to Landsdowne today instead of Off the Wagon, I'm pretty sure I'm officially de-friending him. Congrats, Spence. You are the beneficiary of my personal dislike for Steve.
FUBAR by 12
Skinny White Guys (2-3) vs. Jeff Stryker is not really gay (1-4)
Will wonders aloud on the smackboard why these two teams suck this year. My guess is that it has something to do with starting guys like Warrick Dunn, Steve Breaston, and Vincent Jackson. For Bardey, it probably has to do with how big of a disappointment Ryan Grant has been. Despite their mutual suckiness, I must pick a winner. I predict that this is the week that Adrian Peterson blows up for like 40 points, and next week is the week he actually blows up, leaving little specks of purple, yellow and black all over Soldier Field.
Jeff Stryker by 4
Last week: 4-2
Overal: 20-10
Drool on this:
But look at what can happen to it:
Good luck to all in Week 6, except for Dekker, who I hope gets a hernial growth in his jaw.
3 comments:
So...the reason I'm a shitty team is because I start Warrick Dunn, Steve Breaston, and Vincent Jackson? Because Dunn scored 14, Breaston 18, and vjax 21. You're an idiot. Nice prediction, commandant.
i predicted stryker by 4, and you won by 4.5. i'd say that's a nice prediction.
oh and another week of sub-15 scoring for AP. airfares are dropping, just like the economy, and i can already taste the salt lick dinner you're going to buy me.
I am riddled with guilt for not living up to your expectations on such a rare occasion of earning your vote of confidence, Sovic. I vow to spend the rest of this season avenging my sad loss to Chuck.
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